“So, how does that make you feel?” Something you might expect in therapy, right?
Does this question ring a bell? If it does, I’d like for you to throw it out the window please. Why? Because that would be one of the last questions a therapist would ask you during a session, most of the time.
Believe it or not, most therapists, as least in my own training, are specially trained to avoid questions as such because it’s viewed as an industry cliche to ask them, a big no-no!
Therapists undergo heavy instruction to reach the highest possible standard when working with their clients. We’re much more creative than simply asking “how do you feel about that.”
We also understand that it may be hard in general to approach any type of therapy because you’re putting yourself out there with fear, stress and doubts in your mind.
That’s why this post is so important for new readers. Below I’ve listed a few things of what therapy is and isn’t, and you might be surprised.
What can therapy do for me?
For starters, I want you to imagine your car breaking down. Around this time you’re probably on Google searching for the nearest and cheapest auto mechanic.
Or you’re asking your Facebook family for feedback on trustworthy mechanics. Either way, you’re off to a good start!
Now imagine your relationship with your spouse, friend, family member or whoever, breaking down just like your car. Around this time you’re probably seeking out help from other friends on what your next move should be.
Maybe you are seeking a higher power or looking for spiritual guidance. Those are all great options too!
But when that car breaks down, do you work on it yourself or take it to someone who has been working on cars their entire life, perhaps an expert?
Maybe you try both. The same goes for therapy. When that relationship is in trouble or you yourself aren’t feeling up to par, and you’re needing extra help with your wellness, a therapist could provide their expertise.
What Therapists Won’t Do
Believe it or not, a therapist will not and probably should not tell you what to do, also known as advice. There are special circumstances when therapists will suggest for you to do something because of your safety, but for the most part, no advice!
So you might be thinking, then why in the heck am I paying for this then?
Great question! The answer, well there’s a few answers, but I’ll share one for now. As it turns out, humans are pretty resilient, full of ingenuity and are creative thinkers when it comes down to solving personal difficulties.
But, there are times when we throw our hands up out of frustration, confusion and life becomes a bit of a blur.
Our friends tell us what we want to hear, our family tells us things we don’t want to hear and we end up putting the problem off as far way as possible. You can imagine what this putting off does to your mind, body and spirit.
As it turns out, most people don’t have time to think for themselves because of a busy life: working all day, paying bills, crazy social life, many family events and the list goes on. So, when can we figure out anything without some peace and quiet?
What Therapists Will Do
Therapy could help you find that answer within yourself believe it or not. Yes, I’ll repeat. The answer you are seeking is usually within yourself.
A therapist will help you pry it out, shed some light on it and help you adjust. The way they do it though is pretty amazing and sometimes, seriously powerful.
But, you will never actually know until you decide it’s time to step into the four walls of therapy. As nerve wracking as it may feel to do this, just know that under all the pain, difficulties, frustrations, fear, you name it, is a powerfully resilient human being just waiting to be free, that’s you.
So continue to go to friends, family and even your faith when it comes to your concerns. Also, sit down with an expert on relationships, communication skills and a person who can help you connect with others, a therapist.
If you think you don’t have anyone to rely on, maybe start with therapy first, then work your way up the list. The point is to hit your problem from all angles.
Just like a car needs a tune-up every now and then, so do human beings. You deserve nothing but happiness, peace and consistent prosperity. Give yourself a break, you’ve earned it.